For those who think I am a liar

Diary Entry 23

  

I was thinking why people pulverize coal during my power plant exam. This post is the only thing I could come up with.

Dear Friend,

During exams people pray for a lot of things. They might pray for easy question papers, a strong memory or a lenient evaluation. I however pray for motivation. Motivation to open the book and start studying. Especially if its history, eh I mean theory paper.  

Exams are such a distraction to my otherwise wonderful life. When I see people who study well in advance for their exams, I can’t help but wonder how they do it. I look at them in awe and also with a little bit of envy because I cant bring myself to study even the day before the exam. Me writing this post with not one but two exams tomorrow will tell you how excited I am about tomorrow’s exam.

If you have asked me before any theory exam, how much I prepared, you would have noticed that I tell the same thing, “Macha, Onnume Padikala.” (Dude, I have not studied anything.) I am not lying when I say this. You however will refuse to believe me because a week later, the faculty will distribute our answer sheets and my mark will turn out to be forty or more out of fifty and that is enough for you to think I am a liar.

But most of the things that they test us in have no relevance in our lives. So I dont study because there is a serious lack of motivation to study. When I want to remember the things that I study or if the teacher is super strict or if it was miss world teaching me, then maybe I would have had some motivation and you would have seen me studying. But in the mechanical department we don't have any miss, leave alone miss world. Also most of subjects, like machine tool design, have no use unless we want to do research. Research happens to be one of those things that make me say ‘yuck’ when someone asks me if I am interested in it. To me it is never ending and futile. It scares me to even imagine me doing it. So why will I be excited about studying subjects like that?

To me the whole process of examination is nothing but writing down the story our professor told us in class a month ago. The problem is that he wants to hear the same story and I don't know the story and if I tell him the wrong stuff then I wont pass. Reading it from the book is going to take a long time but no matter how massive the book is, I can be complete it in the three hours right before the exam. Sometimes its makes me think I have the worlds speed reading record. I really don’t read the books though. What I do instead is exchange information with my buddy. I go to his room and tell him I haven’t studied anything and I ask him to teach me all the stuff he has studied in 5 mins and he gives a quick overview of the entire syllabus and I will end up having the frame work for my story. So next time when I say it will take only 5 minutes to cover the entire syllabus, you will know there is some truth in what I say and it is not a mere exaggeration. A helpful friend like this can go a long way from you being a failure to a topper. So I end up writing the story the professor told us but I will miss the details of the story. I will add my own details based on logic and imagination and that is how I get marks in any exam. You might have done this too but without the same results. The difference between you and me is that I write relevant stuff and you don't. If they ask you to write the Ramayan please make sure its Ram and Ravan and not Jesus and Sadam Husein. You can make the demon kill the god, because it really doesn’t matter who killed who or what did what, as long as you get the names and the terms right, because in a exam they only look for keywords and not the logic that connects them. Sadly some teachers can be a painful exception to that rule and you must watch out for them.     

After the exam when I am given the answer papers with more marks that I deserve, I don’t sit and smile like you do. I fight with the teacher as if he did great injustice to the boy who spent his entire life studying for that particular exam. I know it is a bit too much and it is me being greedy but better marks in the first two internal means I can sleep in my room or maybe go home during the third internal.

Nane padips illa (I am not a nerd). So next time when I tell you I haven’t started studying, please don’t think I am lying. Log on to facebook and you will find me there. : )  

Love,

The Narcissist

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