Friday, August 26, 2011

Ashley and Mamta

Diary Entry 24

Ashley is short for Ashok Leyland. Before you send me a message congratulating me, let me tell you that I did not get the job :D 

Act I

Scene I


8:00 Pm

Me: Eda look at this new picture Mamta put in her facebook page.

Not the chief minister of Bengal, Mamta. The Movie Actress/Singer/Cancer Survivor, Mamta.

Roomie: She is so yuck.

Me: :| Are you kidding me man? She is the prettiest actress in the Malayalam movie industry.

Roomie: She is shit.

Me: She is a goddess.

I change my wallpaper from the black BMW that was there, to a picture of Mamta.

Me: We shouldn’t even drool at her da. It will become a sin :D

Roomie: Too much hype for the worst looking actress ever.

Me: I bet if we said we wanted to build a temple for her, we will get crores of rupees as donation.

Roomie: Okay why don’t you pray to her from now on if you think she is a goddess.

Me: :D :D *Grins *

Scene II


7:30 Am

I never wake up early, but recently I have been obsessed about blogging. I became so obsessed that people started spreading rumors that I propose to every chick that follows me. The publicity even though negative involved my blog and any publicity for my blog was good. :D

Roomie: You are always sitting with your blog or reading other peoples blogs.

Me: Hmmm. It is fun. You should try sometime.

Roomie: Yeah? I have better things to do.

Me: Lol. Yeah, you are right. Blogging is for jobless people like me. :D

I prepare to shut down and go have a bath and get ready for college. My roomie sees the new wall paper of Mamta I put up yesterday.

Roomie: Change your wall paper da. It looks horrible.

Me: Hey!! Dont say bad things about goddess :D You will be punished.

Roomie: DAI!!

I joined my hands, looked at my laptop and pretended to pray.

Roomie: Your day is going to be the worst day possible. You just wait and see.

Me: We will see :P

8:30 Pm

Roomie: Hey Ashok Leyland is coming next Thursday.

Me: Did I not tell you something awesome is going to happen?

Roomie: What?

Me: Mamta :P

Roomie: OH GOD (He puts his hand in his head)

Me: haha. I don’t think I will sit though. I thought they will come after independence day. I don’t have my certificates or any interview clothes.

Roomie: Why don’t you go home this weekend?

Me: Well is it really worth the trouble? Three hundred people are going to sit and they are going to pick people in single digits for the job. That is a very slim chance.

Roomie: Still, lets give it a shot.

Me: Hmmm so I guess I will go then huh?

Roomie: Yeah. That will be a good idea. :)

So I ran home that weekend and have the entire episode of the “Shopping Blues”, got all the certificates and came back.


Scene I


7:00 Am

I was looking at the past year question papers.

Roomie: You going through all that?

Me: Yeah. Some questions in this paper came last time :)

Roomie: Ashok Leyland is not that stupid to repeat question papers da.

Me: Well since we did not prepare anything, we might as well do this.

Roomie: Lol You pray to your beloved Mamta.

Me: Hey! I forgot about that :D. You just wait and see, I am going to clear the apti test today with her power.

Roomie: Haha Sure.

Scene II

3:00 Pm

The first round and the only round that day was the aptitude. When I finished the aptitude, I knew that I had done well but if I had done well then the other people would have done better. So I go back to my hostel to take a good long sleep.

(Phone Rings)

Friend: Where are you?

Me: In Room. What happened?

Friend: We have to go back to give our attendance da.

Me: What? Nobody would have gone to class? What are they teaching there anyway?

Friend: Well if you get lag in the end, you will get OD. But that is only if you sign in the paper they have there.

Me: Shit okay lets go.

One might think that the whole purpose of doing an engineering degree is to find employment but in my part of the world even if there is a possible chance of employment, classes WILL go on as usual and you wont get attendance for anything.

When I went there, they had asked us to assemble to read out the names of the people who got short listed. Bored and hopeless I was texting my text buddies.

Voice: Aaakj Vasjkd Rasgkj

Me: (Did someone just read out my name)

Then he read it out again.

Me: Whaaat? :O

I find it extremely irritating when some people cant even pronounce my name properly. How hard can it be for an Indian to say that? It did not sound like my name but then he said it the second time. I had cleared the first round. I was one in the thirty.

Scene III

 (I call my mom)

Me: Amma, I cleared the first round.

Mom: Oh. How many people cleared it?

Me: Thirty over all. Seventeen from my branch.

Mom: How many people gave the exam?

Me: Three Hundred.

Mom: Okay. Do well like this when Ford comes.

Me: This is better than Ford. They pay a lot more here.

Mom: Oh. So you want this job?

Me: I wouldn't need counselling for depression if I happen to get it.

Mom: You can still try for Ford rite?

Me: No they allow only placement in one company. If I get a job in multiple companies, then I will be denying the chances other people have.  I cannot sit for a Ford, if I get a job here.

Mom: WHAT? That is so unfair.

Me: Sheesh. Is it unfair if I have a higher paying job and go for a interview in a lower paying job?

Mom: Hmmm. Still. Okay then. Bye.

Me: Bye.

Then I call my father.

Me: Acha. I got thro...

Dad: Kutta I will call you later.

Me: oka..(Phone Cut)..y

After fifteen minutes my dad calls.

Dad: I was driving. What happened? Is it your mess bill again?

Me: No Acha. You know that company I told you about last time when I came home to buy clothes for my interview.

Dad: Yeah? What about it?

Me: Well I cleared the aptitude there.

Dad: Okay. When is Ford coming?

I don’t know why my family is obsessed about ford.

Me: I don’t know.

Dad: Dont worry if you don’t get placed here. Just do your best to get placed in Ford.

Me: Sheesh thanks dad.

(Phone cut)

8 hours later

(Phone Rings)

Mom: Eda, Did I congratulate you for clearing the interview?

Me: Uh I don’t remember. But it doesn’t matter amma. It is not like I will get the job. I might.

Mom: Congratulations :D

Me: Thank you Amma.

It took 8 hours to sink in.


Scene I


11:00 Am

It has been three weeks and they have not said a word about the interview. In the end during when  the interview came, it happened in the worst possible way. It was video conferencing and the people from NIT were also attending it with us.

Me: What did he ask you?

NIT Guy: He asked me what mems was?

Me: What?

NIT: yeah. I said it is micro electro mechanical systems.

Me: That is correct but it is no way related to mechanical. You have to be in electrical to know that.

NIT: He told me it was wrong.

Me: What else did he ask you?

NIT: He asked how do you measure surface finish? I said in microns. He said it was wrong. He doesn’t know anything da. Everything I say, he says it is wrong.

Me: lol okay.

NIT: Seri ah na bonda va irukane da. (He is one bonda da) (See picture to know what 'Bonda' is)

Me: :D Did he put you in a lot of stress or something?

NIT: Dude that guy did not even look at my face. Forget maintaining eye contact. There will be none. He will look down and ask questions.

Me: Sheesh okay.

NIT: One guy even started yawning when I was answering the questions.

Me: Oh man.

Scene II

It was my turn in the interview. I had prepared the about me speech and tell me about your training speech like everybody else.

Interviewer: Briefly tell me about yourself.

Me: Sir I did my schooling in SSV tambram. My parents are both doctors. Since I...

Interviewer: What doctors?

Me: Dad is home physician and mom Dermatologist. Since I had no interest...

Interviewer: Where are they located?

Me: Tambaram.

Interviewer: Okay continue...

I say the about me and there is not even the slightest reaction from these people. They were not looking at me nor reacting to what I say. Forget smiling and sounding confident. It doesn’t make a difference.

A lot of technical bullshit was asked and a non mechanical student wont understand any of it and mechanical students wont be interested in any of it. But this how the interview ended...

Interviewer: What is the alloy of brass.

Me: (Is brass not an alloy itself? How do you make a alloy of a alloy?)

Me: Dont know sir.

Interviewer: Thank you.

I did the interview considerably well but after the interview I really did not care if I worked for the company or not. I had no respect for the people who asked me the questions. But the high salary they promised to give made me want the job. :D

A friend of mine asked me a copy of mamta’s wallpaper. I can give it to you but it wont help you clear your aptitude test. :)  

When the list came out they had taken four out of the seventeen people. I was relieved that it was all over. The butterflies in my stomach finally stopped flapping their wings.

I planned to write this if I got a job but then like my friend said before the interview, when everything is over, the sun will continue to rise and my parents will still love me, so I thought, what the heck. I am not really sad about anything so I might as well write the blog I intended to write :) :)

P.S - I have not seen any of Mamta's movies. I just like her. She had cancer and she continued acting and singing and doing everything she was doing when she had it. That is enough for me to like her :P 

Previous Post - For those who think I am a liar


30 Comments for this post:

Shriram Kumar said...

Finally after a long time.....nice one bro...seriously thought u'll be thru in M.S. is ur mantra i guess.......

Vijay Menon said...

Ah! Your Mamta tales just keep coming. BTW you remember the CV I sent you na for the poojari?

And about the job - We have FORD to come so do not worry. Good Luck!

CHINTU... said...

dude... send me mamtha's pic please...:)

Prince Tiwary said...

Hey I asked you to write a blog when you get through but you still wrote it.
Let me tell you if you would've been placed the blog may not be as interesting as it is now.Cool lovely and properly narrated.

prbhas23 said...

dnt worry dude !! mamta ll help you in ford :) said...


though you didn't get the job, still there's so much to learn

Unknown said...

Didn't hire you, Entirely their loss, trust me :)
BTW, Glad that it's all over now, kinda sad about my choc tho ;)
And your Mamta, she is sweet :D

Love, Risha :)

CookieCrumbsInc. said...

:D Awesome, love the flow of the narration and not really sad that you didn't get it coz I hope you try somewhere that has something to do with writing:)

What IS the Ford obsession?:P

And Mamta? Really? *looks at her picture from all angle* No. Really?

Ayushi said...

You know what, when a reader reads a really really long write-up to its completion, that itself is an award for the writer :). I just gave you one :)

You're going to get hired soon, something tells me :) haha :D seriously, no kidding on the job front :D

And I don't know much about your beloved, I just opened a new tab and am going to google her :)

Love :)

Nirati said...

Yaaay, you blogged!
Your way of narrations rocks, you know! And its funnyy too :D
AL didn't get you, woh log ka hi loss hai ;)
Gooood luck! And why so much Ford Ford?? :s

KP said...

That was one funny post..
Aw.. so sad that u didnt get through.. keep trying for Ford..
and may be this time try praying to some other goddess.. lol..

The Damned Writer said...

Whoa, dude! Simple..but smooth narration...a story very well told!

New to your blog...I'll keep coming for more :)

So, you better keep your blog addiction intact :D

And really...mamta?!:P

Siddhartha Joshi said...

Great! Quite an interesting post to read :)

I also sat for an interview while I was doing Mech engg (TVS Motors, incidentally in the same town as Ashok Leyland), and can completely relate to the emotions :)

the other side of me said... I can so relate to this attending interviews sucks at times..well whatever happen at the end of the your parents still loves you!!!

Very interesting and funny conversation..i instantly loved it..thanks for dropping by my blog,if not i might missed a nice blog of yours;):)

trust me,im going to be here for quite long:):)

Confused Soul said...

haha dude...don't tell me your talking about Mamta Mohandas? Are you, are you? :P ... Hehe she does look cute.. But wallpaper, really? :D

Awww it's okay you didn't get through this, you have better options man! :) .. And people like these interview nutties, they need a lotta teaching, don't you think? Manners, education and crap.. They don't make sense sometimes... Btw well-written :)

P.s. New to your blog. I Like! :D

The Narcissist said...

Hey Mamta is the best :D Lol yeah in my next interview, I am planning to tell how much of an ass my previous interviewers were and how grateful I am to ones who are interviewing me now. :D :D :D

The Narcissist said...

Thank you :) I hope the stuff I write makes you smile :)

The Narcissist said...

Glad you found it interesting. I am probably gonna have an episode with TVS myself

The Narcissist said...

Lol thank you :)

And yes mamta is the greatest :D

The Narcissist said...

hehe will think of some one for the next company :D

The Narcissist said...

lol idk why there is so much hype abt ford :) my parents like the company for some reason :)

The Narcissist said...

hehe thanks a lot :)

The Narcissist said...

I want money :D writing wont pay as much :P and Yeah Mamta is awesome :P

The Narcissist said...

Lol everybody seems very disappointed that I dint get AL :)

The Narcissist said...

Much has been learnt :)

The Narcissist said...

Yeah there is no questioning the power of Mamta :D :D

The Narcissist said...

Lol I thought, what the heck. I am not really sad about anything so I might as well write a blog I intended to write :)

The Narcissist said...

Mamta wont save you my friend :)

The Narcissist said...

Haha lol yeah there is ford :D

The Narcissist said...

LOL after the interview, even I thought I would get, but I guess I am destined for something else :D