Sunday, June 26, 2011

The Terrorist

Diary Entry 11 

When I was in 8th grade nobody wanted to go to New Jersey, but my aunt talked us into it.  

My grandmother had to extend her visa the last time she was in the US. Though the Visa extension was approved, the documents was with my uncle in America and if you looked at her passport, you will think that she stayed for extra month last time illegally. Well that is exactly what the airport officials thought once we landed there. So this guy takes her to another room to verify. Me and my mother sit on the floor waiting for my grandmother and there is no sign of her. It so happens that they figured out that my grandmother got a visa extension within 10 minutes, but her passport was given to another lady. We had to wait for the officials to return her passport. So me and my mom wait and wait.

I drank too much free soda in the plane and I needed to use the toilet badly. So when I ask the guy there where the toilet was, he told me the nearest one is in the floor below, but if I go there I wont be able to come back up again. I told him that I needed to use the bathroom badly and then he asked me to use the one on the far corner of the floor I was in now. So I walk over there to take a leak. The only guy anywhere near the area is a cleaner who is moping the floor. I take a leak and walk back and this tall and muscular white guy stops me.

American: Sir.

Me: yeah?

American: What were you doing there?

Me: I went to piss.

American: It is a Restricted Area.

Me: The Toilet is a Restricted Area?

American: No that place is restricted. You are not supposed to go there.

Me: I am sorry sir. I wont do it again.

This is the response I have been giving my school teachers since kinder garden. My mother taught me that before the first day of school. I have always got away when I said this. But this guy wasnt going to let me go. I think he would have got a medal if he sent boys like me to prison.

American: Come with me.

I go with him to the toilet where I just went. I see the cleaner. I have never been more happy to see a toilet cleaner

Me: Sir. If you dont believe me when I tell you I pissed here. Please ask the man there who is mopping the floor.

American: Did you see this boy a moment ago?

Cleaner: Yes sir. I did.

American: You saw him, coming here and taking a leak?

Cleaner: Yes sir.

When someone tells you that they saw you taking a leak, you will feel very ashamed. But I have never felt more glad in my life. I wanted to turn back and say, "Ha. He saw me taking a leak." (and I wanted to do this ':P')

American: Can I see your id?

The cleaner shows him the id.  

American: You can go son.

Me: Thank you sir. I will try not to use any public toilets in your country.

I walk back to where my mother was sitting.

Mom: What took you so long?

Me: The guy over there thought I planted a bomb in the toilet amma.

Mom: What?

Me: Yeah I know. For a moment I thought I was going to go to prison, but the cleaner sent from heaven saved me.

Mom: Did you do something?

Me: Well I did use the public toilet to pee, which I am never going to do again in this country.

Mom: Hmmmm

Me: I love India amma. You can pee anywhere if its really urgent. People will understand. But in this country you cant even use the toilets that man has built to pee.

I was 13. 

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