Diary Entry 21
This post is not meant to offend or criticize. Views expressed in this post are opinions formed by personal experience. Some of you might think I could have had a more neutral opinion but I will be writing lies if I wrote any other way. :)
So when the girls left Harry Potter and moved on to Twilight, I got smart. I was afraid that reading the book 'once' was going to be pointless so I thought I will just watch the movie (several times if I had to). When I was told that the movie was about vampire, I got all worked up and excited. I mean, I love immortal, good looking, blood sucking monsters who can seduce and control the minds of beautiful women. Before I saw the movie, I actually thought I should read the book first for a richer vampire experience. When I saw the movie I realised that not reading the book was the best decision I ever made in my life. If you see Twilight you will notice that they have made the Vampires in the movie less vicious and more girly. What has the world done to those poor soulless beasts. Vampires whose skin glitters when they come out in the sun? Really? Sigh, I wouldn’t be surprised if vampires started riding around in unicorns next. I don’t really hate Twilight or anything, but you just shouldn’t deceive people by telling them Twilight is a movie about vampires. Vampires give guest appearances in Twilight. I watched the first movie with my friend and that is one of the reasons why Twilight became one of my least favorate movies. This is what happened:
Friend: Edhavadhu Padam Papome da. (Let’s see some movie da)
Me: What kind of move do you want to see?
Friend: Some action or fantasy movie.
Me: Hmmm. There is this movie called Twilight. It’s a vampire movie. Want to watch?
Friend: (all excited) Seekram podu macha. (Come on. Put it on fast.)
Half an hour passes
Friend: Are you sure this is a vampire movie?
Me: That is what my friend said.
One hour passes
Friend: Dai *@#^ (abuses in Tamil). I don’t see any vampires.
I open IMDB website in the back.
Me: Look at this da. Its IMDB. Even they say it’s a vampire movie. What the hell am I supposed to do?Not believe the authority when it comes to movies?
Friend: If you wanted to see a award padam, you should have called your grandmother. Did you have to see it with me? You know how much I hate such movies.
Me: Award Padam na enna macha? (What is a award padam?)
Friend: Award Padam is a boring movie that puts everybody to sleep but ends up getting all the awards.
Me: I am sorry da. Everybody said this was a semma movie (awesome movie).
Friend: Yeah rite. They must have said that because it must have got the Oscar or something. :x
Me: It has a 5.4 rating in IMDB. I think most people felt the way you are feeling now macha. At least that is what I think because it has a low rating in IMDB.
Friend: YA. AFTER PUTTING ME THROUGH ONE HOUR OF BORING SHIT, YOU DECIDE TO TELL ME.
Sigh the movie was a disappointment in so many ways and my friend has mocked my taste in movies ever since. Is this not enough an excuse for not reading the book?
Some girls that I know come and talk to me about how awesome the book is. I try to conceal my irritation and tell them politely that I haven’t read the book so there is no point in talking about the book to me. But instead of moving on by talking about something else, they get a big ego and act as if they just read War and Peace. Sigh, if only I could curse them with all the abuses that flood my head. If it were my friend, he wouldnt have held back. I don’t read a lot of novels, so I don’t know about a lot of authors. There was this one girl who kept talking about books, and I thought this girl must have really fine taste in books. I thought since I have never heard of any of the authors she is talking about, she must be really smart and well read. After a couple of months I learned that one of those authors she liked a lot, wrote Twilight.
|Photo provided by Araknus (Sunki)|
Me: Your boy friend is really smart is he not?
Toxicpunk: Yeah I guess. He gets me so impressed sometimes.
Me: He seems to know a lot. He must read a lot like you I guess.
Toxicpunk: Haha he reads my ass. Lol he reads Chetan Baghat and Paulo Coelho. That’s what he reads. Haha
Me: eh huh huh :D (uncomfortable laugh)
Ever teased someone because the only thing they read is Tinkle or Spider man comics? Well Toxicpunk scoffs the same way at anybody who reads Paulo Coelho or Chetan Baghat. She never holds back insults and its best to pretend that you have never heard of Paulo Coelho when she is around. Well I never thought Chetan Baghat was a great author. I thought his first book was a terrible. I read it during my 11nth grade and I couldn’t connect with it. I am in my 4th year of college now and I am having a even more harder time connecting with it. (How is it possible to clear all subjects and still be a 5 pointer huh? It’s impossible.) It took great stamina to go from one page to the next. But still when I was done with the book, I thought it was sort of my reading achievement. Everybody except me liked the book. I did not drop the book mid way even though I was a little bored and that by my standards is quite an achievement. She in a matter of minutes demeaned one of my achievements as a reader. You can’t blame her. She has probably read every book that has ever been published. You probably want to see her now :D. But if I put her picture here, guys will find her extremely pretty and she doesn’t like people raving her looks :D. If I did not have someone like her as my friend, every girl in the block would have made me think that they got a degree in literature from Cambridge.
The second person who has superior English is Toothpaste. When I was told that 90% of the people who took the GRE test got a score lesser than me in English I thought my English was good. Well for Toothpaste the percentage is 98%. That will reflect in her every day conversations. If you know how to read and write Hindi, and if you have ever tried reading the Bhagavad Gita, you will realise you can read it, but you don’t understand what you are reading. Or if you are a Tamil guy and if you have heard the Thirukural being recited, you will know it is Tamil but you can’t exactly understand what is being said (atleast I dont). Well when Toothpaste writes or speaks in English, it’s the same thing. You know what you are reading or hearing is English, but you can’t exactly understand what is being said. I can understand what she says only because I studied for the GRE. You should check out her blog ‘Five Feet Talking’. If you haven’t studied for the GRE or if you don’t read as much as she does, then it will be pretty useful to have a dictionary by your side when you visit her blog.When Toothpaste read my blog she said, “I think you are an obnoxious, chauvinistic, womanizer. But since you are a little funny, I like your blog”. She did not say it in underlined bold :D. Toxicpunk will not be as kind as Toothpaste if she thinks what I write is pathetic. I am doing everything to butter these two people, so that they won’t say mean things about my blog :D. Of course it’s not going to work but it is still worth the try.
For the reader - I like Harry Potter. But I cannot be called a fan because I have not read the book so many times. I dont hate Twilight. But that doesnt mean I can talk about it in conversations. I like Chetan Baghats Two state but think his other books were only average.
For toothpaste - I gave you a free advertisement here. You better be nice :D
For Toxicpunk – I will get you a blue berry cheese cake if you are nice :D
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